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Or, My Top 10 List of What I’d Give the Husband for Father’s Day, If I could

10. A tie.  For reals.  What can I say?  He likes nice ties.

9. A French cuff dress shirt.  It would go with the tie.  And the three sets of awesome cuff links I got him for Christmas last year, completely forgetting that we had just gotten rid of his last French cuff shirt because it was just old.  It was straight out of O. Henry.

8. A bobcat.  It doesn’t matter if it’s the actual animal or the small construction vehicle.  The man wants a bobcat, and if I could get him one, he’d love me forever.

7. A cell phone.  The man needs a cell phone and we just haven’t had the time or the money to buy him one.

6. A new Jesus loin cloth, but that would be more of a gift for me than for him.

5. A successful year for his Philadelphia teams.  LOL  I couldn’t say that one with a straight face.  He knows I love him, and he knows that, grudgingly, if my teams somehow ceased to exist, I’d be so happy for him if his won something big, but that’s about it.  I’m a terrible wife when it comes to sports.

4. A new wardrobe.  We are both in need of some new clothing, but I’ve gotten mine updated somewhat recently.  He puts himself at the very bottom of the list most of the time, but especially when it comes to silly little things, like the clothing we wear everyday of our lives.  If money were no object, I’d buy him 7 suits, a tuxedo, a Prince Charlie jacket and a new dress kilt, and some tails.  He’d be suited up every day.  And he’d put all the other lame dads who came to the playground in shorts and polos to shame.

3. A shaved head.  He’s been dying to shave his head bald for about five years now, and he hasn’t simply because I’ve told asked him not to.  He’s a good husband like that.  If I could find it in me, I’d tell him to go ahead buzz it.

2. A job.  Seriously.  It’s been a hard year for all of us, but harder for him because I know how much he wants to be able to go out to work everyday and earn a paycheck.  If I could magic one up and give it to him, I think it’d possibly be the best Father’s Day present ever.

1. A vacation.  He needs one.  Desperately.  It doesn’t have to be anything big.  It could just be a day at the ball park with his dad, but he needs a little break.  Of course, it would be better if it was a two week stint in Jamaica with me, but who am I kidding?  We’d never survive that long away from our kids.

In response to prompt number 3 in this weeks edition of Mama Kat’s Pretty Much World Famous Writer’s Workshop.

Mama’s Losin’ It

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