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If you’re pro-life, like I am, then you probably have serious issues with Planned Parenthood, Susan G. Komen for the Cure, the March of Dimes, and several other organizations.  Then there’s the people you most likely take issue with as well, including Kenneth Cole, Gwyneth Paltrow (and her mom, Blythe Danner), and President Obama and his entire cabinet and staff, among others. Much as we all know to stay away, keep back, hide our wallets when these clear offenders against life come knocking at our doors, there are other, less obvious individuals and groups from which we should be withholding our financial support — such as Dr. Seuss.

If only Theo. S. Geisel was as sensible as Dr. Seuss and Horton

If only Theo. S. Geisel was as sensible as Dr. Seuss and Horton

I know, I know.  I love his work.  I really do.  It’s fun, it’s catchy, it’s a part of American (in particular) childhood that most of us share.  It’s loved by kids and grown ups alike.  And the proceeds still go to his widow, who, along with her husband while he was still alive and continuing to the present day, presents large donations to Planned Parenthood.  That’s right folks.  Every time you purchase a copy of Horton Hears a Who, with it’s beautiful message that “a person’s a person no matter how small”, Audry Geisel (Theodore S. Geisel aka Dr. Seuss’ widow) receives a portion of the price, and with that money, she supports the murder of innocent, “small” human beings by donating to Planned Parenthood.  It’s not a small thing to consider, especially when one thinks about the millions of copies this book in particular and all of his books have sold worldwide.  All those individual sales add up, and even just a percentage of a percentage is a large amount when talking Dr. Seuss sales.

Now, I’m not saying drop Dr. Seuss and his zany characters like a bad habit.  Far from it.  What I am saying is to be careful as to how you procure copies of his books. If I flatly refuse to give money to Planned Parenthood via Seuss, how do I satiate my thirst for more Seuss you may be wondering?  Easy peasy.  I got this.

How to avoid giving Planned Parenthood money and still keep reading those rhymes:

  1. Use the library, fool.  They are a great resource and, what’s more, the librarians in the children’s sections are usually more than happy to do Seuss read alouds if they have a crowd.  At least, mine are.  If yours aren’t, I feel for you.
  2. Used book stores and websites offer a wide variety of both titles and pricing.  And you can take advantage of somebody else already making the purchase you didn’t want to make (because maybe they didn’t know or, sadly, didn’t care).  No money from you is going to Planned Parenthood.
  3. Curriculum swaps.  Especially if you homeschool, you can not afford to not be on at least two to three different swap lists.  People are constantly trading, selling, and sometimes outright giving away extra copies of books that are simply collecting dust in their homes but will be joyfully put to good use in yours.
  4. Ask your relatives and friends.  I don’t know about yours, but my family and friends are a great resource for old books, especially of the children’s variety.  Then again, my family could easily populate a small country on its own, so maybe scratch this one.  Aw hell, go for it.  What’s the worst that could happen?

And if, after all that, you still can’t find enough Dr. Seuss without purchasing new copies (which I highly doubt, but just in case), remember the words of Dr. Seuss in Horton, and juxtapose them with Theodore Geisel’s actions.  He preaches respect for life, “no matter how small”, and then proffers money to the single largest abortion chain in the country.  No amount of funny words or silly sounds or giggling is worth more than a single baby saved from abortion because the Geisels didn’t have your money to donate to Planned Parenthood.